The battle continues

It has been six months since the passing of Zeke. Three months since my TAC surgery. My grief continues to come in waves. Other days I am fine. Some days I am not. As the holiday season approaches, it absolutely breaks my heart that the homecoming arrival of my son to San Diego during the…

Invisible Boundaries

It’s been well over a month post-TAC surgery. I’ve received some questions on Abbyloopers about my recovery so I just wanted to check-in. I’m so thankful to say that my recovery has gone really well. Days after my surgery, I was resuming normal activity and walking around for miles a day here in NYC, albeit…

A Detailed Overview of my TAC Experience with Dr. Haney

Thursday, August 3, 2017 – Arrival Day My husband and I flew into Chicago O’Hare airport. It was a direct flight from NY’s LaGuardia airport, which is only 15 minutes away from our apartment. While the nerves arrived well before this day, they really started to sink in when we touched down in Chicago. With…

Transabdominal Cerclage Tips

Here are some helpful tips that you should consider before your TAC surgery.     Saturday Morning – Try to schedule the first appointment on the day of your surgery. If you can book a Saturday, I highly recommend it! There was no one in the surgery center when I checked-in and even after the surgery. Fiber and…

Cervical Insufficiency: What now?

In addition to my consults with my physicians, I have relied heavily on information through multiple resources to make an informed decision before deciding on my TAC. I highly recommend you do the same. Here is a sample of medical journals, blogs, youtube, hash tags on social media, reviews of doctors, and message boards that…

You are your best TAC advocate

If you decide to get a TAC, brace yourself for the opposition you will be receiving. Stick to your gut and pray about it. Be your own advocate because, sadly, there won’t be many out there. My OB/GYN’s office is literally downstairs from my apartment building. When I exit my building to the right, there…

Do It Again

Counting down two weeks and some change until my TAC surgery! I have updates to write about my follow-up appointments with my OB/GYN and my appointment with a Maternal Fetal Medicine Specialist at Weill-Cornell yesterday. These posts will have to wait until I get through all my work the next couple of days. In the…

Explaining loss to a Kindergartner 

One of the most heartbreaking experiences of losing my son has been telling my daughter about his death. For 5.5 months, she asked so many questions about him and would always talk to my belly.  “It’s a boy, mommy! Now I don’t have to share my toys!”  “Good morning, baby brother!”  On our morning commute…

My Phone Consult with Dr. Haney

On the day of my phone consult with Dr. Haney, I paused and invited God into my conversation with him. I asked God for his guidance in helping me to determine if this is the procedure I should complete and if Dr. Haney was the doctor I should go to. I had been thinking non-stop…

Baby Steps to my TAC

On April 25th, I took my first step towards getting a transabdominal cerclage by contacting Dr. Haney via email. Dear Dr. Haney,   I am writing to you in hopes that you can help my husband and I.   I am a healthy 34-year-old woman who resides in NYC. My husband and I have a healthy, beautiful 6…

God of Miracles

After seven weeks of short-term disability and bereavement leave, I headed back to work this week. I expected the awkwardness but it was still painful. “It was a surprise to all of us. Listen – I don’t even know what to say to you.” “Usually management sends pictures of the baby after delivery. How are you? How’s…

Why do you want a transabdominal cerclage?

After experiencing the loss of my son, there is nothing more in the world that I would want for my family other than to be happy again. Happiness, in my mind, equates to having the opportunity to have more healthy, happy, beautiful children living here on this earth. Children who will live full, long lives….